Oh fair bloggers, as I finish the last glass of a fantastic bottle of wine I feel the need to share a short conversation that I had this evening with my parents whilst watching "24". I think that this interaction with them is a great example of why I am so messed up, in a socially positive way.
As my father left the living room adjacent to the kitchen to grab a piece of chocolate the discussion began:
Dad: I am going to get chocolate, I could get it for myself but...
Me: That would be terribly rude
Mum: Bring the chocolate or suffer the consequences.
Dad: Fair enough, I do want to get laid tonight.
Mum: ::exasperated sigh::
Me: Dad, so do I but some things just ain't happening.
Dad: Ah well, worth a shot.
Scientists have not fathomed a number high enough to count the amount of times my parents and I have had a conversation filled with talks of sex or sexual innuendo.
As I begin to ponder having my own children I feel like I should record these moments and show them to them when they take me for group therapy.
As my father left the living room adjacent to the kitchen to grab a piece of chocolate the discussion began:
Dad: I am going to get chocolate, I could get it for myself but...
Me: That would be terribly rude
Mum: Bring the chocolate or suffer the consequences.
Dad: Fair enough, I do want to get laid tonight.
Mum: ::exasperated sigh::
Me: Dad, so do I but some things just ain't happening.
Dad: Ah well, worth a shot.
Scientists have not fathomed a number high enough to count the amount of times my parents and I have had a conversation filled with talks of sex or sexual innuendo.
As I begin to ponder having my own children I feel like I should record these moments and show them to them when they take me for group therapy.
Labels: fucked up shit., parents, sex
6 Comments:
Sadly, after two cancer surgeries, my parents just throw their innuendos in our, their children's, direction.
But my mom's forearm stuck in a turkey will remain a classic for me.
Uhhhhh....that is one thing I'd rather not hear about from either of my parents. I was conceived immaculately, dammit. I think any conversation to the contrary might make my ears bleed.
I'm with Jaded.
I'm with Nick and Jaded.
That's fabulous, and exactly how I want to be with Hubby in front of our children.
I have an uncle and aunt who constantly terrify the family with all sorts of sexual innuendo. A few weeks ago, she put on a wrap around dress and necklace my uncle gave her...and she proceded to BEND forward to show off her cleavage to him. I totally choked on vomit.
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