Free Wheels East

I got to meet these cousins on the street here in Brisbane. They are crossing 50 countries without ever getting on a plane.
Aside from being freaking hot, they are doing some pretty cool stuff while on the road, so check them out!

www.freewheelseast.co.uk

My newest obsession

"Oh Please you must be joking, if you think you will be givin' me a pokin"
- Lily Allen

My new favourite album is "Alright, Still" by Lily Allen a hip chicka from England. Check out the music on her website. NOW!

In other news, this is my new haircut!
You know that "just cut" look? The one you get when a fantastic stylist with patience and care makes your hair look fabulous? I want to bottle that and never make it change, because it will never look this good again.
Well maybe after my next haircut.

A new week begins with the joys of being the first to present in a course as well preparing for 15 gazillion group projects. GAH!

Australia vs. New Zealand

A fantastic event is going on tonight, Australia is playing New Zealand in rugby. My favourite part is the little dance New Zealand does called a "Hakka". It looks like the All Blacks are about the rip off their oponents throats and eat their brains. The latest version of the dance involves a throat slit motion.
Just a little aussie culture for you all.

I heart you guys.

Grey was an awful colour on me.
Washed out my complexion.

Now if I can just figure out where my sidebar went!

I also gave up and got a haircut and now have slick locks a la loz.
I'm also now obsessed with a $300 flat iron.
Gah.

Now go send nick some birthday love.

BAAAAA

This isn't the finished product, but my old template was pissing me off (looking at the same thing over and over).

It's either this or cut my hair and I've finally started to grow it out.

I am a sheep

All these pretty new blog templates is making me itch for a change, a la gecko and fly.

Yays or Nays for a new template?

Oh Colin,

I will admit that I think Colin Farrell is one hunk of man that I would never want to touch for fear of catching an STD. One particular woman by the name of Dessarae Bradford has decided to make him her "bitch". She has written a book, made bumper stickers, recorded a song, started a blog and went on Leno to confront him. Talk about enterprising off one night with a celebrity.

Bunch of Liars

All of you.
All I got out of my little experiment was 2 audio clips from nick telling me what a loser I am.

Double Dog Dare You

Alrighty ladies and Gentlemen, I double dog dare you to leave me a voice message. I put my voice out there for the whole world to hear and I bet you could leave something that only little old me will get to listen to!

I was going to put up a post of my brothers collection of signs from the road trip, but blogger is being bitchy about uploading pictures.

I've had enough. I want to go home, I want to get a place and decorate it and have start a life.
Enough limbo.

Stock Characters.

I've realised recently that girls in romantic comedies fit into 3 categories:

1) Leading lady who is conventionally beautiful and incredibly tall (think, Cameron Diaz). She can't get a man and is oh so sad about it. She does however get hit on by guys ALL the time. Hilarity ensues.

2) Leading Lady's best friend who is not conventionally pretty and destined to die alone because she is only 5 foot 5 inches (or is gawky and tall, think Joan Cusack) and doesn't have the same weight as a pack of sugar. She is incredibly funny and smart and helps make leading lady look even prettier by comparison. Now don't get me wrong, supporting character is not ugly, she is very warm and has a very non-threatening school-marm kind of style that doesn't involve high heeled shoes. Often times she ends up with an unconventionally attractive man (probably a dentist or something) and so ends her story.

3) Leading Lady's best friend who is while not conventionally attractive is still not as "desirable" as the leading lady but is married and has kids. Her life is in balance and she loves her husband (who is probably not built like Matthew McConaughey but more like Jim Belushi) but she either desperately wants to see her best friend with a man and all happy like she is or longs for the days when she didn't have to change diapers and got to eat day-old chinese food straight from the box.

Now obviously all three of these stock female characters exist because somewhere in a room with a big table fat white men sat around and crunched numbers and decided that these are the three basic types of women that the female audience can identify with.

Today this fact is pissing me off. I’m not a number 1 or a 2 or 3. I’m more of a 2-3 combo, the girl who sits around and listens to her perma-single friends talk all about how they went to some bar and made out with some guy and got all “jiggy” with it. They tell you about all the men that were fawning over them and how much fun they had but then quickly chase it with a “oh but I SO wish I was at home with a stable man, like you are with TFG”. I tell them about how jealous I am that I don’t get to slut myself up all the time and let dirty drunk men paw all over me and then the cycle ends, the glasses of wine are empty and we all go our separate ways.

Then ya know what happens? I go home, kick off my pretty-but-painful heels and sit back on the couch with TFG, snuggle in that wonderful place on his shoulder and watch TV. I like it there! I’m not up for looking for fun and excitement at bars, because lets face it, fun and excitement at bars leads more often to STD’s then it does a nice cosy night on the couch.

So to all the 23 year old girls who look at me and think “oh how it must suck to be settled” let me just tell ya,

It’s fantastic.

Odd.

So I'm walking down the street today and I saw a man with two tattoo's.
The first Tattoo was on his right thigh and said "Right Leg"
The second was on his left thigh and said "Raw Power"

I can't imagine the thought process that made him get those.

Bored Bored Bored

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Boob Scotch

While driving in the car listening to Triple J radio a song came on that opened with "Hey! You got your boob in my scotch!".
I've never laughed so hard at a song in my life, or been that unsure if I should be offended.

Apparently "Log Bob III" has penned other classics like "Clap Your Tits" but boob scotch* is still my favorite for stentimental reasons.
For the rest of the trip when ever one of us asked for a drink from the cooler some one would say "are you sure you don't want a boob scotch?"

TFG was the only one offering to stick a boob in a scotch, and no one likes a hairy drink.


*word to the wise, don't watch the video, its just boobs in scotchs and a wierd guy with a space helmet.

Gone

My boys left today.
Tall 18 year old babies, got on a plane.

I know that fish and house guests go bad in three days, but I miss them already.

Grapefruits

The crowd that goes camping is very different from the crowd that stays in hostels. You often find an older group of people in hostels with massive RV's that have more space in them then my apartment. One nice couple even laid out fake grass for the two block of concrete next to their RV. Some have washers and dryers and shades. They are pretty kickass compared to the two person tent I spent 14 days in, but I digress.

One night when we were playing cards in the "camp kitchen" my brother ran up to use the toilet and noticed the man in the urinal next to him was having trouble doing what one normally does whilst standing in front of a urinal. My brother, rarely around older people thought he was funny and said "Prostate the size of a grapefruit, eh?" the nice man replied "Well no actually, I had to have it removed last year".

My brother ran back to the kitchen feeling like an asshole.

Sydney

Back in Sydney with my brother and his buddy before they leave me on monday.
Shirley made it home but her gearbox (ha, box) busted and thats a $700 replacement, lovely.

If you like underwater photography, we put some albums up on kodak

more regular blogging next week.

In the meantime I will be looking to the skies to see if $700 can land in my lap.

Cape Tribulation

During our travels we found out about a town called "Cape Tribulation" that boasts a population of around 500 and has no power. If you want to go any further north in Queensland, you have to have 4WD because there are no more proper roads. The appeal of being able to say we had "been to the end of the road" was enough appeal for this tiny rainforest town, but so was the opportunity to go "surfing" in the rainforest.

This sport is also known as zip-lining, where you get strapped into an harness and fly across a series of ropes so that you can swing from the trees and see the beauty of this untouched wonder.
People that know me would be amazed to hear that I went 22 meters in the air and went for a ride (upside down on one them)!
The only thing we were worried about was the road to Cape Trib as driving it vaguely reminded me of the PCH in California, very slow and windy and with assholes on your back the whole time trying to do 80 in a 40. The whole ride there I was concerned for our little car and TFG reassured me that the car would be fine.

He lied.
As we got on the ferry to get back to Cairns (pronounced Cains which I forgot the r in the last post, sorry Nick) the brakes stopped working.

Being the good little planners that we are had gotten an RACQ membership before we left (like AAA) with "ultra care" so when our car couldn't get us home we were able to get a tow to the town of Mossman and a hotel room for the night for free.
When the tow truck came he said we probably had water in out brake lines and got us to his shop.

After helping us find possibly the most delicious Chinese food ever, the mechanic left us at our hotel.
The proprietor could not have been sweeter, and told us that she new was it was like to breakdown and upgraded us to a deluxe.
My brother and I noticed a peculiar symbol on her neck, but being tired we decided to go to our room and thought nothing of it.

As we were getting settled I started reading the "welcome folder" that told us all about the town and the resort.

When I started reading the letter from the owners, the pendant made a bit more sense.
"At the White Cockatoo, no feathers required October 1st to May 1st"

We were staying at a nudist resort.

Although we were there for the "feathered" season, we were more then welcome to join them for nude cocktail hour, should we be so inclined.

The four of us had a great laugh making double entendre about the chalet being made of hard wood, the seats were rather cheeky, you can imagine.

All in all it was a great end to our day and the car breaking down wasn't so much of a worry (especially when the repairs cost a whopping $88) the owner brought us extra towels, tea, and cream for the morning and we got to not camp and sleep in proper beds.

The next morning we were on our way with a comment card filled in by my brother that said "Nudists, that's cute"

So thanks White Cockatoo, for making our trip memorable!


Update:
Today in the mail I received "nude on moon" from sysm... how fitting.

She Lives!

Made to Cains, and dove to then end of the road (Cape Tribulation).

Ran into some minor car trouble, but we all lived and Shirley will need some help when we get back.

Did more diving with an underwater digital camera, so videos of me with turtles and such will appear soon.

The drive home starts tomorrow, more posting from home!

Miss you all!

Knitty