Friday!!!

Yea I'm a thief, and I'm doing a roundup


1) Tech support
Finally the beauty of the internet at work! My iPod had started skipping on me and being just generally not cool then all of the sudden it started cycling with this awful picture coming up like a poor little dead iPod. I tried to reformat it but it decided it wasn't talking to my computer (something about a dirty usb port) and everything went to hell. Luckily I was online with tech support (read: Nick) and he convinced me that I could call for help here in Oz and that someone would help me, as Apple people are very nice.
I didn't believe him. My years of working with PC repairmen and sales-persons had made me jaded, but after 2 hours of screwing with it and getting nowhere, I gave up and decided to call my local "Apple Doctor". It appears that apple actually keeps a global registration of serial numbers to determine if my poor baby was still under warranty, so it doesn't matter that I don't have a receipt or that I bought it in another hemisphere, tomorrow my iPod goes to the doc to hopefully get fixed (or replaced).

2) Tattoo....
This weeks tattoo is so ugly and terribly placed that I couldn't possibly but it on my blog, but here is a link. Make sure the kids aren't around.
Are you feeling lucky?

3) I have to go grocery shopping.

My list is a little more exciting then this one, but not much.




ah yes, its the saving that gives the pleasure... not the cucumber...

4) So in Uni, you actually have to write assignments?

I have 4 assignments due next week. There will be very little knitty action for a while guys, sorry!

Have a great weekend!!

Every once and a while

Whenever a news story comes on about the US or Canada, or a musician or actor we remember from there comes on TV, TFG and I get very interested. Being able to have a moment or two that reminds us of home is really key to surviving homesickness!
That is why when Jason Mraz was on the morning show this week, we were glued to to the television, and hilarity ensued. The hosts, Koshi and Mel, didn't seem to give two shits about Jason or his music and were just filling time before the next segment. They seemed so disinterested that they didn't realize the joke that occurred or it's a case of North American slang not having the same meaning.
In a frightening case of reality/blog crossover, Mraz blogged about the same television incident:

03.28.2006
2 is the magic number

...
Tv anchor lady: Good morning Australia! Coming up after a look at our national forecast, American writer/songsinger Jason Mraz performs for us. Don’t’ go away.

Jason: Blah blah blah blah, it’s all about the airplay… (sung to the tune of wordplay)

Mr. TV man: So Jason, your second album, number 2, was it hard getting this one out?

Jason: (pause… a look of disbelief)…

An amazing opportunity stood before our hero. There was only a 7 second delay between our live, on-air antics and what would be seen on televisions in pool halls and retirement communities across the continent. The anchor had unknowingly laid the bait for Jason, the morning news otaku.

Jason: The number 2? Yes, it was hard getting the number 2 out. But I think it’s made quite a splash.

Tv anchor lady: Blah blah blah blah (Turns to Toca)

Toca: Uhhhhhhh…. (using up the entire 7 second delay bringing Tv full speed ahead into the present. So much for that day light savings delay due to the commonwealth games.)

Mr. TV man: We’ll be right back.

Monkey Memories

Nick introduced me to Monkey somewhere around the fall of last year. He showed me one of her movies and I was hooked. I slowly began reading the Monkey blog, but I didn’t have the guts to post a comment. I dragged my brother in my room to listen to Monkey’s rendition of “Gypsies, Tramps and Thieves” and being the wild creative boy that he is, had to explore Monkey’s whole movie collection as well. A few weeks of reading the blog and the warm, supportive, funny comments that it inspired, and I grew the nerve to write a comment. Monkey received me with kindness and began visiting my blog as well, an event that got me jumping up and down good times. Monkey and I began commenting on each others blogs on a few occasions but I never thought I was a blip on the radar, just some blogger that he was kind of nice to.

Then my birthday came, and I asked for 100 comments as my present. I got a most fantastic one from Monkey that made me feel really special, my very own Monkey movie and a post on her blog in ode to me. Everyone I knew had to hear the movie (the laptop in the kitchen was key in that) and probably wondered who the hell this person was sending me happy birthday wishes. It seems odd to people (especially those who don’t blog) to see someone being that nice to a person they have never met.

Monkey is just that kind of blogger, he has a warm and beautiful spirit and wants to make everyone feel special. I miss him tons and hope to see him back in all him wildly creative, funny and warm fantasticness.

Feel like joining in on the monkey memory fun? Feel free to talk about our furry friend in the comments or write you own post! Head on over to Jiggs Blog to see who else has written a monkey memory and if you like, add yours to the list!

Morgan replies

on his very own blog

The comments have responses from students that were in attendance, a few of which say he is lying and a few that praise him.

Either way, he had to speak out since the AP took this story and ran with it.

Easter is coming.

I wonder if he will give me any chocolate.

Hell ya

I've always felt that people that are anti-abortion should join a planned parenthood clinic, since they are preventing more abortions then any anti-abortion picket.

Another vocal writer feels the same way, and has a few choice words for South Dakota

It's pretty long, and the author goes off on Christianity for a while in there, but all in all, I had a giggle at times.

Oh Morgan, what were you thinking?

I am a HUGE fan of "Supersize me" and think his TV show was also a great idea, but this seems a tad out of line.

HORSHAM, Pa. Mar 26, 2006 (AP)— The filmmaker who ate nothing but McDonald's meals for a month for his Oscar-nominated film "Super Size Me" gave a profanity-laced, politically incorrect speech at a suburban Philadelphia high school, but not everyone was lovin' it.

Speaking at Hatboro-Horsham High School's first-ever health fair, Morgan Spurlock joked about the intelligence of McDonald's employees, about "retarded kids in the back wearing helmets" and teachers smoking pot in the balcony.

The special education students in the back row were led by teachers out of the hourlong presentation.

"If you put the whole package together, the use of the F-word and poking fun at teachers and the comments about special-needs students, it just wasn't appropriate," Superintendent William Lessa said.

Most of the 700 students laughed, gave him a standing ovation and mobbed him for autographs. A speech Spurlock was to make at the school later Friday night for community members was canceled.

Spurlock said he's never had a complaint after giving similar talks at other high schools and colleges. He said he had been told shortly before his appearance not to talk about McDonald's because a board member of the Hatboro-Horsham Education Foundation, which sponsored the appearance, owns a franchise.

The association's director did not return phone calls seeking comment.

"The greatest lesson those kids learned today was the importance of free speech," Spurlock said.

I would have totally expected to say something disparaging about McDonalds, but did he have to swear infront of them? The whole "retarted kids in helmets" leaves a bad taste in my mouth. Kinda like McDonalds fries.

Went to a party

Went to a party

My first Aussie house party, with a theme no less.
“Bad Hair”
I teased it and sprayed it with the Fructis equivalent of “Aquanet”
It came out smashing and got crazy looks on the bus.
Got to the Host’s fantastic “Queenslander” style house
Beautiful hardwood floors, art on the walls
Collage was created on the walls, old school Polaroid pictures of our hair
Stuck on the white paint with blue sticky tack.
Host with the most, what a chef.
Antipasto and sushi for all.
Fantastic music, comfy chairs on a comfy porch
Kitten comes to say hello and nibble on my wrist
The Aussies love to hear me swear.
Say the Canadian accent makes it sound like a little kid, who just learn how
Because you can hear every letter in “fuck” and the “ck” is staccato and crisp
People trickle in, people trickle out
Barbeque lights up
Lamb, sausage and ribs for all
People keep touching my hair and I don’t feel it.
Played ‘drinking bingo’ get 9 dots and don’t win.
Don’t care, so much fun.
TFG and I walk to bus stop
My friend lied, buses stopped running hours ago
We are stuck in the middle of nowhere
Costs five dollars to get in the cab
Sixteen to get home
Cabbie is sweet, shuts of meter half a kilometer from home
Manage to take off eye make up before passing out.
Deal with the hair in the morning.


It took 3 conditioner treatments and a shampoo before I could feel the water on my scalp, and there are still sections with birds-nest-like knots. spend the morning nursing a mild hangover, watching "paths of glory". The life of a film master's girlfriend, gotta love it.

I'm learning...

Why did I think it would be different and I wouldn't end up feeling like a maid that doesn't earn money?

Before I left California I was following the case of a young woman in Orange County who was drugged and raped at a party. If discussion of this (there is nothing graphic in the links concerning the act) is not something you can handle, I understand. For those readers there is a great video link in the next post down. I will be back to my regular bland inoffensive nature soon, sorry for the break into seriousness.
-Knitty


A few weeks back there was a discussion on Sysm concerning the treatment of victims in rape cases.
In my discussions with some people I found that I didn't even know the extent of hell a victim can be put through in trying to prosecute their attackers.
A teenage girl in Orange Country was drugged and then gang raped on video tape by 3 boys, and it took two trials in order to get them convicted, and even then only for 6 years. To get a full grasp of what a victim is up against,
read her statement to the court
Of course not all accused rapists have the income to send private investigators to ruin the accusers life, but these boys did and they (through their lawyers) did just that.
The blogger, "Pinko Feminist Hellcat" has a large database of blog posts, recounting the several year ordeal this girl has been subjected to, and is a part of a network of bloggers trying to sent support to this 19 year old girl. For information on where to send an email of support click here

Bloody HELL!

Loz mentioned in my last post about how Canada has jumped on the bandwagon of countries that are banning the "Where the Bloody Hell are You?" ad for Australian tourism..


Thanks to the beauty of "you tube" you can watch it your own damn self

Steal me...

I made this... please feel free to steal it and put it on your blog...

In the same theme of theft, I am stealing an idea from Nick who stole it from Todd and letting everyone ask me questions.

Go on, whatever you like.

Off to play grand theft auto for a report I have to write..

Oh St. Patty...

As all of you get your celebration on, I am slowly waking from the fuzzy details of what the hell I did last night. These are the hangover ramblings so pardon their disjointed nature.

It all started off very innocently, went to class, bought a car, had some beer, drank a bottle of wine... then things got silly.

I realized yesterday that I do very little with the people from my program partly because they all suck and partly because they live on the other end of town. I decided to try and fix this by going drinking with them. I pre-drank at a girlfriends house and drank wine while she straightened my hair and now I'm addicted to flat ironing! She had 6 house guests on top of the usual 3 that live in her flat, so the place was packed with crazy backpackers and on in particular that I debated taking outside for a beating. She was 4 foot nothing with a drunken mistake of a tattoo on her exposed back (she thought it normal to run around town in bikini top, the slut) that looked like a cartoon dragon from some fluffy Disney movie. I went out to the patio and found her SITTING on TFG's lap with her naked back all over him. I guess I said something or growled or shot venom from my eyes because as soon as I walked in she jumped up off him so hard I thought she was going to smack her head on the roof..

we got to the bar around 7:30 waited in line only to find out that TFG's exposed toes would some how hurt the reputation of the bar and had to go home to change, so drinking didn't start until around 8:15. We met some fabulous girl in line from Ireland that kept cutting in between Gaelic and English which made the highly inauthentic bar seem a little less so. I don't care if you don't actually play the Cd's yourself but don't play frickin Lindsay Lohan on St. Patty's day.

The band started up and played those wacky one hit wonder songs from the 90's we all loved that were just terrible for dancing to (think "Breakfast at Tiffany's") but I still managed to work it a little on the dance floor with random Aussie boys and TFG.

I think we stole a platter of cheese and ate it like ravenous dogs.
I somehow managed to put temporary tattoos on my neck and arm that are green and say "Guinness" on them.

A man was hitting on me, trying to figure out if I was drunk enough to take me home and shag me but not so drunk that it would feel like he raped me, I don't know why but I grabbed a girl and said I was going home with her... didn't really turn him off though.

I'm pretty sure we left the bar around 11:30 and walked home, and I managed to take off most of my makeup before I passed out.
Since about 7:40 am I have been trying to slowly get motivated to, well... brush my hair. Instead I've been lazying around the flat in my bed sheet, watching Simpson's and hangover blogging.

TFG has gone for some fresh baked cinnamon rolls.
And a hangover smoothie..

So much for being all mature and responsible.

Friday

Happy Saint Patty's day!!

My freak flag for the day? I have a hairy stomach. From navel to underwear line I have a "happy trail" only its not all curly, just really long and unless you have a six pack waxing is next to impossible!

How about another tattoo? If you are at work or have small children around, dont scroll!

Also, I did a word cloud a few weeks back, and here it is...




















Well at least he wears it with pride..
and the lettering has some art to it..

I bring you flowers and a .22 with shells

I was starting my 25 minute commute to school, listening to my iPod and I found deathcab to be a little to quiet and timid for my lethargic saunter so I whipped on some Bare Naked Ladies.

God, I love that band. There is something about a band that doesn't sing about the same tired subjects all the time that I find really interesting. They are able to write songs of empathetic poetry from a variety of personas. They show compassion without pity and a creative edge in talking about people who commit suicide, wash high rise windows, work on a farm and go crazy and single mothers while never looking down at these characters they create.

I got the chance to see them perform with the Toronto Symphony Orchestra and a full choir and it was just amazing. Hearing their sometimes goofy lyrics backed up by 50 singers and some fantastic instruments would have been comical if it hadn't been so beautiful.

In other news, things on the car front are looking up and we could have it all sorted and driving by Friday! I got frightened last night at the prospect of being so grown up, having a car that managed to pay half of, having an apartment my parents didn't help pick out and decorate, getting gray hair, it's all been very empowering...except for maybe the gray hair.

Thanks for all the kudos on the new blog template! I made it myself as a test run for the one I have to make for school, how sweet is that?!?

How great would this be for an English class?

I'm thinking that "Avenue Q" is the new "School House Rock" For those of you who don't know about "Avenue Q" it's a musical with muppet style puppets that live in the ghetto, and have Gary Coleman for a landlord. Some other great songs from the soundtrack are "The Internet is for porn" and "Everyone's a little bit racist"

"Schadenfreude"

GARY COLEMAN:Right now you are down and out and feeling really crappy

NICKY:I'll say.

GARY COLEMAN:And when I see how sad you are It sort of makes me...Happy!NICKY:Happy?!

GARY COLEMAN:Sorry, Nicky, human nature-Nothing I can do! It's...Schadenfreude! Making me feel glad that I'm not you.

NICKY:Well that's not very nice, Gary!

GARY COLEMAN:I didn't say it was nice! But everybody does it! D'ja ever clap when a waitress falls and drops a tray of glasses?

NICKY:Yeah...

GARY COLEMAN:And ain't it fun to watch figure skaters falling on their asses?

NICKY:Sure!

GARY COLEMAN:And don'tcha feel all warm and cozy,Watching people out in the rain!NICKY:You bet!

GARY COLEMAN:That's...

GARY AND NICKY:Schadenfreude!

GARY COLEMAN:People taking pleasure in your pain!

NICKY:Oh, Schadenfreude, huh? What's that, some kinda Nazi word?

GARY COLEMAN:Yup! It's German for "happiness at the misfortune of others!" NICKY:"Happiness at the misfortune of others." That is German! Watching a vegetarian being told she just ate chicken

GARY COLEMAN:Or watching a frat boy realize just what he put his dick in!

NICKY:Being on the elevator when somebody shouts "Hold the door!"

GARY COLEMAN:"Fuck you lady, that's what stairs are for!"

NICKY:Ooh, how about...Straight-A students getting Bs?

GARY COLEMAN:Exes getting STDs!

NICKY:Waking doormen from their naps!

GARY COLEMAN:Watching tourists reading maps!

NICKY:Football players getting tackled!

GARY COLEMAN:CEOs getting shackled!

NICKY:Watching actors never reach

GARY AND NICKY:The ending of their oscar speech!Schadenfreude!Schadenfreude!Schadenfreude!Schadenfreude!

GARY COLEMAN:The world needs people like you and me who've been knocked around by fate.'Cause when people see us, they don't want to be us, and that makes them feel great.

NICKY:Sure! We provide a vital service to society!

GARY AND NICKY:You and me!Schadenfreude!Making the world a better place...Making the world a better place... Making the world a better place... To be!

GARY COLEMAN:S-C-H-A-D-E-N-F-R-E-U-D-E!

What a week!

After an incredibly crappy week, TFG and I sent to see some Koala's and Kangaroos.

301

This is my 301st post. I feel bad that 300 went by without any acknowledgement, but it was cute post so I'll live!

I'm too tired to think of anything witty, 8 hours of class in one day will do that to you.
My freak flag is that I'm 23 and yesterday I found 5 gray hairs. 5! Luckily they are all hidden in the lower layers of my hair, but it definetly worries me more then it should.

New theme, weekly ugly tattoos. I should clarify that I do think that tattoos can be fantastic and very well done, and that I love a nicely done tat (just ask TFG). That being said, I find ugly/incredibly wierd tattoos just amazingly interesting/funny because someone PAID to have that injected in their skin!

I mean honestly, if a man showed you this, how attractive would he be?

Lizzy Liz

Nick didn't believe me when I told him that I had a pet lizard that adopt TFG and I.
Here is the photographic evidence.

Unfortunately Lizzy Liz only comes out at night so our pictures of him are kinda crap.

Next picture of him I hope to have a pop can nearby or something so you can get an idea of how big he is, he could easily fit his entire body in the palm of my hand. We fear that if he leaves us the other lizards will eat him, since they are prone to that sort of thing.


When my brother saw this image he decided that lizzy, just like our pets and the seal that likes to go surfing with him, needed a backstory. I intend on recording his various backstories simply because they are hilarious.
So here goes, the story of our new roomie the lizard...

The Story of Lizzy Liz

You see lizzy always was a lonely boy, in school he was never really too amazing at anything, never really stood out of the crowd. He always did well in school but never really like to be interactive with the environment, a little shy some would say, others thought he would bring a gun to school. But no less lizzy made his way through high school and all of technical school where he learned how to build racing kites, but he soon learned that kites can only go so fast because they are tied to a man. The kite racers never were more than 100 feet long and he never was very interested in them. He decided that he needed to find something new, carve out his own niche in a world that had not rejected him, just never paid any attention to him.
That’s when he started his act in Vegas, he was a singer a dancer and a mediocre magician. Nobody went to his shows because they could never really hear what he was saying, his small vocal chords made his singing about 12 octave above what a normal human can hear and nobody seemed to enjoy his magic, but the dance, oh my god the dance was it ever amazing. Lizzy knew he had to take his show elsewhere, somewhere that he could just dance and not have to worry about pulling a rabbit out of his hat, for his hat was very small and the rabbit relatively large.

He spun his globe with all of his heroic strength, which made it move about ½ a lap, and he found himself face to face with Australia, since he only stood a few inches tall, otherwise he may have ended up somewhere in the pacific or maybe Asia. So he was off, the next plane out took him all the way to LA where he threw himself into an envelope and paid a hobo to put him in the mailbox (he could not afford the plane so the USPS was the only way). His box was really quite roomy. He had a bed, and a cooler filled with food, a large stack of dance aficionado monthly and it wasn’t that cold since he is cold blooded. Now he was in the great land of Australia and needed a place to live.
A cute couple in a hostile seemed to be from North America and he thought he could get along well with them. He switched his box out with their sheets and snuck into their bags as they moved into an apartment he loved. Now he is currently looking for work at local dance studios and hoping that he will one day be the queen of the desert.

dance on little lizzy, dance on...

I like a person with priorities

Chill

Posts that have hopefully no possiblity of offending people will be the main focus on the blog for a while, since I manage to get people up in arms all the time.

just cuteish photos.


Everyone loves The Hoff, right?

Freak Friday

Too many of these is making me realize I'm a pretty freaky chicka.

screw it.

also? hate white bread, unless it's Italian.